Dear Damona: Is it racist if I don’t want to date outside my own race?

Chat with us in Facebook Messenger. Find out what’s happening in the world as it unfolds. More Videos Parents and kids on interracial dating Luke, a white seventh grader, believes his parents would not be supportive if he dated an African-American girl. Jimmy, a black seventh grader, recounted that after he had several white girlfriends, his parents seemed to interpret it as an affront to his own race. Their stories highlight a divide not between the races, but between the generations.

“My Racist Parents Disapprove of My Boyfriend”

Once upon a time, Barack Obama dated a white girl. When details of this story came out last week , some outlets reported it with the thinly veiled implication that Obama, so beloved for having married an exceptional black woman like Michelle Obama , had some kind of dirty secret. That Obama, the first black president of the United States, allegedly felt that a non-black partner would be a liability to his political career says a lot about the way we view black leaders, activists, public figures and those whom they choose to date.

But does dating a white person really make someone less black? Less down?

To most people, dating someone of a different race isn’t an issue. However, within some families, interracial relationships are frowned upon and in some.

Young Muslims find a middle ground for fostering romantic relationships between what is permissible and what is forbidden. Fahmida Azim for NPR hide caption. When year-old Nermeen Ileiwat first began college, she could not wait to get into a relationship — maybe even get engaged before graduation. But after one year, the rising sophomore realized she had no idea what she wanted out of life and was in no position to get into a relationship.

That decision didn’t last long. Only a few months after, Ileiwat met someone at a party, and their friendship quickly turned into something more. However, dating was not that simple for the now year-olds who are Muslim. They have religious restrictions that limit physical contact in premarital relationships.

They chose to focus more on developing their emotional intimacy, with the occasional hug or kiss. Out of respect for their religious beliefs, Ileiwat and her boyfriend decided not to engage in any advanced sexual activity until they’re married. For young couples like them, the idea of dating is common, and it means balancing their religious views with their desire for emotional intimacy. But the term “dating” still invites an offensive suggestion for many Muslims, especially older ones, irrespective of how innocent the relationship may be.

Dating is still linked to its Western origins, which implies underlying expectations of sexual interactions — if not an outright premarital sexual relationship — which Islamic texts prohibit. Ismail Menk, a renowned Islamic scholar, argues in one of his lectures that love, within boundaries and with expectations of marriage, is an accepted fact of life and religion — if done the right way.

Adopting a Child of a Different Race

Less than 3 percent of all marriages were interracial in , and the public generally disapproved of such unions. Interracial marriage was even illegal in at least 15 U. Although the U. Supreme Court ruled that laws prohibiting interracial marriages were unconstitutional in , a reported 72 percent of southern white Americans and 42 percent of northern whites said they supported an outright ban on interracial relationships.

Journalist and author Radhika Sanghani, 27, explains why she’s on a quest to not marry the man she’s expected to.

Hostility to mixed-race marriage is a thing of the past, or so thought Zara Badawi. And the last place she expected to find it was within her husband’s family — and her own. Travelling to meet my in-laws for the first time, I passed the six-hour drive memorising the Dos and Don’ts I’d listed to help me make the best impression: eat with my right hand, keep my hair covered, my gaze lowered and address my parents-in-law with “ji” to show my respect.

Don’t fidget, crack my fingers or do anything that could single me out for ridicule or disapproval. I wore shalwaar kameez and as we drew up to the house I pulled my dupatta over my hair. I fretted about the silky material slipping off without my knowledge and tugged at it self-consciously. Right then, I envied women who had worn this all their lives, their movements unrestricted by the fear of dislodging it. Swallowing my rising panic, I followed my husband, Imran, to the door.

My mother-in-law answered and with a murmured “assalaamu aleikum” and greeted us both in the customary way: a hug, cheek-to-cheek on one side, then the other, then back to the first. The moment had arrived — I was entering a house where I wasn’t entirely welcome. The father and grandfather had refused to attend our wedding.

15% of Canadians would never marry outside their race: Ipsos poll

He and I went to high school together. He is honest, funny, sweet and caring. He treats me wonderfully.

Nirej Tamilrajan had gotten into a cab after saying goodbye to his fiance when the driver asked him a pointed question: “Why? Not enough Indian.

Last Updated: June 2, References. This article was co-authored by Collette Gee. Prior to Collette’s coaching business, she worked in the mental health field as a psych nurse which has helped inform her practice to create and sustain happy, healthy meaningful romantic relationships. There are 10 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.

This article has been viewed 71, times. Once socially frowned upon in some cultures, more and more people accept interracial dating and marriage as a non-issue these days. One factor that still inhibits interracial relationships is a fear that family will react negatively and reject the relationship. If you are worried about your family’s reaction to the news that you are dating someone outside your race, you may want to initiate a conversation to let them know and to reassure them about any concerns they may have.

Why interracial relationships aren’t a magical cure to racism

Q: My daughter is 14 and is getting interested in boys, and she seems more attracted to guys outside of our race. I am not a racist person but I would like to discourage this for one simple reason: That a lot of people aren’t fair to a mixed couple and I don’t want her to suffer for this. As I write this it sounds like I’m prejudiced, but I really don’t want her to be in pain as a result of this.

Is there a way of discouraging these relationships without seeming prejudiced? Plain and simple.

Travelling to meet my in-laws for the first time, I passed the six-hour drive memorising the Dos and Don’ts I’d listed to help me make the best.

However, within some families, interracial relationships are frowned upon and in some instances can lead to families being torn apart. It can be difficult to have a good relationship with your family if they disapprove of your partner, but following expert dating advice can provide a way in overcoming some obstacles, which will hopefully lead to your parents displaying a more accepting attitude. Relationship expert, India Kang , has answered our questions to give you advice on how to tackle the main interracial dating issues.

We are looking at both sides of the picture, whether you are struggling to cope with conservative parents of if you are dating someone with conservative parents, as it can be stressful for both of the parties involved. How should I dress? Should I take a gift and if so what? For some it can be mind boggling. Introducing a partner who is outside your culture is best handled with some care and thought.

Paternal Race/Ethnicity and Birth Outcomes

I applied the same analysis to infants of Black parents and infants with a Black mother and White father. Not listing a father on the birth certificate had a strong association with outcomes, which might be a source of bias in existing data and a marker for identifying infants at risk. Despite great improvement in birth outcomes in the United States, significant and continuing differences persist across racial and ethnic groups.

The low-birthweight LBW; defined as a birthweight less than g rate of non-Hispanic Black infants has been steadily nearly double that of non-Hispanic White infants.

be born to unmarried parents varies substantially by the mother’s current education level and by her race and ethnicity. In , 28 percent of.

Want to discuss? Please read our Commenting Policy first. At least 15 per cent of Canadians would never have a relationship with someone outside their race, according to an exclusive poll by Ipsos for Global News. The poll found participants with only a high school education 20 per cent and Ontario residents 19 per cent were more likely to share this point of view. All of the Ipsos poll data is available online. According to the National Household Survey, 4.

Women Who Won’t Date Their Own Race!


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